Moldy Oldies-Infamous Archives from the Eagle's Notorious History

Editorial Comments

By Zack Darling

Not many folks know it, but the Eagle has had quite a controversial history: student mutiny, faculty boards to debate and censor the Eagle's editorial policy, and some very risque articles have caused quite an uproar within the college community.

Some people are embarrassed by the Eagle's history. Well I am definitely not one of those people. A few weeks ago I dove into our files of archive newspapers and dug through the many phases of the Eagle's existence. In my nostalgic research I found that some of the previous editors have been bland and monotonous with the paper. On the other hand there are some chapters of the history of this small student newspaper in which the editorial staff really took the freedom of the press to its fullest extent. This colorful history includes the Eagle coverage of the Academic Senate's "no confidence" vote and protest against the former MC president, Leroy Lowerey, and the student takeover of the Eagle which led to the printing of the notorious, Illegal Eagle.

I was so thrilled with some of the articles that were printed between 1987 and 1991 that I decided to resurrect these infamous stories and share them with you. As this column develops we will follow the story of the controversial flight of the Eagle.

This particular article was printed on March 5th,1987. The editor of the paper in '87, Craig Harris, is also the author of this story. In th ose days, the Eagle was a four page newspaper and they only printed a few hundred copies (Today we range from twelve to sixteen pages and print up to 2,500 copies). When this article hit the campus it created such an uproar that a forum was held to debate the editing policy of the Eagle. Letters to the editor poured in from students. The forum dialogued about the freedom of the press and attempted to define obscenity. Carl Ehman, who was the Dean of Instruction at that time, was quoted as saying, "I've seen some rather 'obscene' (foot) ball games, until someone picked up the ball and ran it back for us." With the support of Dan Hibshman (the Eagle's faculty advisor at that time), the forum decided that it was important for the Eagle staff to experiment with all forms of journalism and that this article was intended for humor only.

If you are offended with the topic of sex, I suggest not reading it.

Unwanted Celibacy at MC?

By Craig Harris

Why was there no ASB Valentine's dance? The answer is simple. There were not enough couples on campus to attend such an activity. Students, start making love!

There are many spots here, on campus, where couples can meet for discreet relations. The library, beneath the shelves of classic literature, is a place you will surely not be disturbed. In class, during the lecture, stay awake- after everyone has fallen to sleep, make quiet love. Your instructor will not notice and lovemaking in class is common on larger campuses around the country. Sneak a quickie in the horticulture greenhouse or have a longer session in the barn. Find an unlocked station wagon in the parking lot or do it in the back of someone's pickup. Have you explored the trails through the woods surrounding campus with a friend? Bring a blanket or pillow to school for the opportunity that may arise.

Men, you are afraid to ask women, you don't know to make love. Come now, how hard can it be? The women on campus are suffering. Women, you too are afraid to approach the men you dream of; I have seen your starry eyes gazing frightfully toward the men you desire. Ask these men to make love. If your first preference says no, approach another and another. We need not be good looking to make love.

Make love with someone ugly and, I assure you, you will find this pleasant. They say girls don't make passes at men who wear glasses: girls, do it with a man in specs, many are starved and hot. Take a walk up to the water tower and do it there.

The excuses are old: "I'm shy,"; "I'm not that kind of boy or girl,"; "I'm not worthy of her,". . . Do you know how many women do without because men feel unworthy of them? Women, do it under the oaks with a man who feels worthy.

"A" student, mathematics will not solve your problem; I heard you suggest a "study session" in the library to your flame. Make love, not dull pencils. Come on, do it. Do it. Study while you recuperate.

You lowly "B" and "C" students, how long has it been? Study time is more efficient after rigorous love. You aren't necessarily dumb, perhaps you aren't getting enough of the stuff of which euphemisms are made. Try harder.

Virgins, start doing it now. Why wait? You, the most repressed ones, are the ones I am most concerned about. Men and women virgins, ask a friend to break you in. The "first time" you long for should be behind the art building in the grass.

Those with boy or girlfriends, why do you fight so much? It is because you are excluding others. Share your best qualities today. Teachers, what's wrong with you? Get more personally involved with your students. How can you resist, and what better place than in your office? Many instructors have already installed curtains over their office windows. Follow suit. Why deny what you want?

People, those furtive glances in the Eagle's Nest will get you nowhere. Approach the one you would have. The smoker's lounge next door is rarely occupied. Start doing it now.

Editorial Comment: I interviewed Bryan Zell who was the Eagle Staff Photographer at the time in which this letter was printed. He told me that many of the instructors at Mendo removed the curtains from their office windows after this letter was published.

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Permission granted to excerpt or use this article if source is cited.

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